7 life lessons I learned the hard way, from moving house badly

We moved house last week…

By “moved house,” I actually mean we relocated all our worldly possessions, our sanity, and a frankly suspicious number of miscellaneous chargers into a garage.

Because the floors in the new house weren’t down yet, we weren’t actually able to put anything into it on moving day, so every single box - all fifty of them - got stacked to the rafters in the (thankfully massive) double garage, with all our furniture piled in front.

It was not the chic, laughter-filled montage of family moments you hope moving day will be. It was frantic packing, cardboard Jenga, tense under-breath mutterings and me discovering that our family owns far too many garlic presses and not nearly enough tape.

We did almost everything the hard way…

Vague labelling - we wrote non-descriptive things like “kitchen stuff” on the boxes. Not “blender/air fryer/kettle/pans,” just “kitchen stuff”, which, post-move, translated to rummaging through 23 boxes to find a plate for dinner.
No “Camp-In Kit” - Whilst I was delighted that my partner bravely volunteered to do all the packing so I could keep working, neither of us clocked that “everything” included nappies, plates, cutlery, the kettle, tea bags, pyjamas, the corkscrew and all the sheets and towels - everything we subsequently realised we needed immediately but was now stacked high in vaguely labelled boxes.
Unsupervised Unloading - Because we had two kids and a cat and lots of cleaning and last-minute packing to do at the old house, we left the movers to unload everything into the new garage without much guidance. This resulted in the majority of the boxes being stacked at the back, with the labels facing the walls, whilst all our large furniture items were stacked in front. I’m sure you can picture the Indiana Jones-style mission it took to find plates and forks at 9pm. Nightmare.

How we kept our sanity (and our relationship) together through this is a miracle, but it did teach me a few valuable life lessons.

So instead of a “how to move house well” guide (clearly not my area of expertise), here are the bigger life lessons I’m taking with me, which I hope will be useful for any messy, transitional season:

1) “When it’s all done” is a mirage

I kept promising myself joy on the other side of “DONE”…

Once we’ve got everything packed, I’ll exhale.
Once the floors are all down, I’ll relax.
Once the drawers are organised, I’ll be present.

And I do this in everyday life as well - once the house is tidy, once I’ve cleared my inbox, once we’ve got the dinner done.

Spoiler alert: “all done” never arrives. Life keeps adding more.

The mentality shift is is giving yourself micro-moments of OK-ness now - a hot drink, two pages of a book, a giggle with your kid - while the boxes are still in the hall or the to-do list is full.

2) Basics first beats perfect plans

Our missing camp-in kit was the metaphor I needed…

In any hectic season, sort the basics first: sleep, food, meds/supplements, a lamp, clean socks, phone chargers, loo roll.

Translated to life: what are your non-negotiable basics this week? Name them. Do those before you chase optimisation.

3) Name the season you’re in

Moving is a season. So are recovery, new jobs, having kids, deadlines, grief.

Naming the season makes you kinder to yourself. It lets you say, “We’re in minimal standards mode” or “This is a gentle expectations month.”

Standards can rise again. For now, lighten the load.

4) Label precisely (words matter)

“Kitchen stuff” created chaos. Specific labels save time later.

In life, vague plans cause vague days.

Swap “sort the house” for “clear the hallway shoe basket.”

Swap “work on myself” for “walk 10 minutes after drop-off.”

Vague gets put off because it’s overwhelming. Specific gets done.

5) Start sorting before you start packing

We should’ve begun months earlier - not just packing, but sorting: keep / let go / deal with later.

That applies beautifully to calendars and commitments, too.

Keep (nourishing)
Let go (draining)
Later (park it and review next month).

Not everything needs a decision today.

6) Ask for the help you actually need

“I’ll do all the packing” sounded noble. In reality, we needed shared decisions and clear roles: one person labels, one inventories, one packs.

In life, trade vague offers - e.g. “shout if you need anything!” - for specific asks - e.g. “could you handle school pick up on Wednesday?”

7) Debrief + forgive future you

We’ve written a “lessons learned” note for the future. Not a shame list - just “Next time, label like librarians; protect a camp-in kit; start sorting in June.”

Likewise in life: jot one thing you’ll do differently next time and drop the guilt.

It’s data, not judgement.

Moving was chaos and clarity in one go. We messed up plenty, learned a lot, and proved to ourselves that progress beats perfection.

Life rarely hands us tidy endings; it offers us small chances to be present in the middle of the mess.

So here’s to the tiny wins: the first cuppa in a strange kitchen, the lamp that makes a new room feel warm, the plate finally rescued from a box marked “kitchen stuff.”

Right tools, small actions, patience - and permission to live before it’s all done.

Tackling Messy Seasons